Forge A New Life
from If I Could Live Long Enough by Tobin Mueller
PART 1
He stands there
across the wide road.
Just stands there,
looking in the window.
Every step from the subway to this very spot
he has counted them all. Open up my life.
He can't move on, one step closer and he's lost.
He can't turn away, take his life and turn it off.
What's behind the drawing curtain?
What's beyond the shadows cast?
Memories we know for certain.
Futures that will come to pass.
Working late every night, waiting for the right time,
hiding papers in an unlocked drawer,
slowly forging...
Forge a new life.
Forge a new life.
You, there... Do you have the right papers?
Are they correctly authorized?
Do you have the proper identification?
Where do you intend on going?
See the borders of your life.
At the boundaries of the world,
there's a man who checks your face.
If you're not who he expects
then your name's erased without a trace.
There I... at the gate.
There I... waiting.
There I... at the gate.
Do I... pass?
What's behind the drawing curtain?
What's beyond the shadows cast?
Memories we know for certain;
Futures that will come to pass.
Working late every night, waiting for the right time,
hiding papers under lock and key.
Lock and key.
Forge a new life.
Forge a new life.
PART 2
If the weight that once framed you
and the darkened days are all left behind,
then the mirror of your hidden hope
will reflect on this new place and time.
Working late every night, just to save what you can.
Filing letters full of words unsaid,
in American...
Like a savior that renames,
gives you courage to simply start again,
there's a genius to this crazy land
that reflects upon my face and hands.
I've come to America.
I've come to America.
I've come to America.
I've come to America, America.
Forge a new life.
Forge a new life.
Would I have learned?
Would I have earned the same mind?
Would I have burned the bridge between dreams and home
had I not left in time?
Would I have lost you
had I stayed and lived a lie?
Driven underground, every right every wrong,
wouldn't every passion die?
What of my sons?
And the sons of my sons?
Would they be proud
when the day is done?
When the day is done?
Can't go back home.
Can't go back...
©2004 Tobin Mueller
This song is in two parts. The first part grew out of a true story: a friend of mine fled communist Czechslovakia, back when leaving was a very difficult task. He worked on his plans for nearly a year, compiling the right papers to forge, setting up his alibis, etc. I heard his story just about the time I was getting a divorce (prior to meeting Suzanne) and it resonated in a personal way. I had always wanted to include the two impression in a single song but never had the right setting. (It never fit into any musical I was working on.)
When I first started experimenting with GarageBand, I searched for an idea that could combine edited loops and samples as part of a song's story telling, to see how the software program worked. I had never written using samples before. I also hadn't done any recording "just for fun" in years, writing instead either for the stage or composing pop songs for my Hong Kong agent. So, the experience was liberating in many ways.
Part 1 was also the first time I recorded Del's voice. (He is the border agent asking for "the right papers.") The sound of his voice was so compelling, I had him record some of my poetry... and the As Simple As Soap project began.
Part 2 takes place after the main character of the song arrives in America. It is a combination of exhilaration and loneliness, triumph and worry. It is also filled with the same questions I asked of myself after my divorce.
This track also marks my first and only collaboration with guitarist Norman Goodman. I admired Norman as a player and thought this would be a great project to have him collaorate on. I emailed him both Part 1 & 2 and set him lose. Other than filters and EQ, I didn't change anything about Norman's playing, which is unusual for me, since I like to tinker. Norman's contributions didn't need tinkering.
After hearing Norman's electric guitar solo in the ending vamp of Part 2, he suggested he also add a bass part. I hadn't realized there was no bass! I added bass using new keyboard software I was reviewing at the time (both acoustic and electric). Norman was right, bass added one more layer of psychological intrigue and tone poem painting to the piece. Thank you, Norman!
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